Diaz's Fuck Fest XII

Diaz's Fuck Fest XII was the twelfth edition of the biggest event in SvR06, held on April 2, 2016. The main attractions of the show were Laugh Like Pee-wee winner Triple H taking on Elimination Chamber winner Dynamite Derek for the vacant World Heavyweight Championship, Batista squaring off with the returning Ultimate Warrior, Charles Barkley, Shaquille O'Neal, and J-Pac teaming up to take on Chris Jericho, Count Out, and "Macho Man" Randy Savage, and Brock Lesnar facing off against Ken Shamrock in an MMA Fight.

Background
Two years ago, Charles Barkley's mother married a man with nothing but an insatiable hunger for power in his eyes. That man was Triple H. In no time, Barkley was dismissed as commissioner of SvR06 and eventually replaced by his tyrannical stepfather. During this time, J-Pac and Ben Unhinged formed a resistance against Triple H's newly-established stranglehold. Despite their best efforts, they were outmatched by handpicked champion Sheamus and the forces of Upper Management. The tide didn't begin to change until Dynamite Derek joined the fight alongside his friends. While the odds were astronomically in the favor of Triple H and Upper Management, the Explosive Broseph would eventually bring the World Heavyweight Title to his side of the battlefield. However, a technicality resulted in the defacto leader of the Justice Bros having to turn the title back over to Sheamus. The prize would continue to elude him, until a fateful contest between then-reigning champion The Rock brought the gold back to the superhero's waist. Unfortunately, it was once again swiftly taken from him as a result of a heated conflict between he and the combined forces of Nateflix and the treacherous Sheik. It was later revealed that everything, from his mask being destroyed to Sheik stabbing him in the back, was a plan orchestrated by Triple H in order to destroy the symbol of Dynamite Derek and keep him away for the World Heavyweight Championship once and for all. Once again, his plans were thwarted and The Dark Luminary captured the title. Only this time, a disputed call and a series of cash-ins rendered the championship without an owner. Commissioner Barkley, in an unprecedented ruling, declared that the winners of the annual Laugh Like Pee-wee and Elimination Chamber matches would compete at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII for the vacant title. Triple H surprised everyone by entering the Laugh Like Pee-wee as the final entrant and winning the 30-man bout, on the same evening that Dynamite Derek qualified for the Elimination Chamber that he would ultimately win. This victory was preceded by yet another obstacle, as Batista ambushed Dynamite backstage before the contest. This, of course, brings us to now as these two titans will face off in the main event of the biggest show of the year to determine who will become the undisputed champion. Before their huge match-up, Dynamite came face-to-face with Triple H, bringing up the seemingly-unprecedented attack by the United States Champion. He then reminded Helmsley of a conversation he was seen having with Batista prior to the event, and finally asked the question of why Triple H doesn't believe in him as champion? Triple H answered by telling Derek that when he first met him, he didn't think he was a worthy champion. But after everything he's put him through, everything that he's withstood, he finally believes he's deserving. But Hunter added that he believes he deserves it more. He continued by telling Dynamite that he's the only one that he's never been able to stop, despite everything he's thrown at him. But at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, he promised to end Dynamite Derek and everything he stands for once and for all. Triple H ended the exchange by emphasizing that he's spent years trying to get his hands on the World Heavyweight Championship and he isn't going to let an internet darling like Dynamite Derek stop him. Dynamite concluded their final encounter by informing his greatest adversary that he won't have to worry about the title for much longer because it will be in good hands. At Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, two journeys will culminate and two roads to eternal glory will cross. Triple H, through manipulation and brute force, has finally obtained the opportunity for which was the impetus of his master plan. On the other side of the coin is Dynamite Derek, who has withstood the loss of everything he fought to protect at the hands of his opponent all perpetrated to keep him from becoming champion. Everything has brought these two men to this, and only can achieve their dreams in the end.

When he opened the doors of Arrested Developmental, Triple H took the opportunity to form an allegiance with Batista. His handpicked "Guardian of the Gates" managed to keep a slew of less-than-desirable talent from reaching their full potential on the main roster while becoming a three-time Main Event Champion in the span of a year. When he arrived on the main roster, Upper Management immediately handed Batista a United States Championship match that he decisively capitalized on. During his time in league with the commissioner, Batista would succeed Sheamus as the new golden boy while being referred to as the true power behind Upper Management. In recent weeks, especially after his questionable defeat of Sheamus, Batista has touted himself as the most powerful force in the universe. All the while, mysterious viral messages have been imploring those who encounter them to "believe." While on one of his tirades, Batista was interrupted by one of these interstellar dispatches that revealed the return of a man who had lost his way under the coercion of Upper Management. The man known simply as Warrior has retreated into the recesses of his mind, and the Ultimate Warrior lives again. If Batista plans on continuing to self-promote himself on a universal level, he will have to overcome the unparalleled power of the returning leader of the Warrior Nation. When the lights are on bright at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, the man known as The Animal will be faced with his greatest challenge yet. No championships on the line. Only a test of who is truly the most powerful force of all. Not to mention who can shake the ropes the hardest. It's the return of the Ultimate Warrior against the uncaged Animal known as Batista, and it only happens at Diaz's Fuck Fest.

While many are looking forward to the highly-anticipated championship showdown between Dynamite Derek and Triple H, one man who has no interest in this title bout is Chris Jericho. Y2J, in his mind, is the true holder of the now-vacant World Heavyweight Championship despite the fact that he failed to make the best of both opportunities he had to main event Diaz's Fuck Fest the night of Laugh Like Pee-wee. Jericho demanded another shot from Commissioner Barkley, who compromised by placing him in a Money in the Bank qualifying match against Wrestler: Unstoppable. The Secret Agent Man was ultimately successful, sending Jericho into an even greater frenzy. According to the paranoid Ayatollah, everything that's gone wrong since last November is exclusively the fault of Charles Barkley. Imploring the commissioner to make things right, Jericho was instead answered by guest assistant commissioner for Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, Shaquille O'Neal. Shaq informed the flustered competitor, as well as his faithful Jerichoholic Count Out, that he is the law at the biggest event of the year and that any complaints should be filed to him in the form of writing. "Macho Man" Randy Savage, although nobody asked for it, decided to impart his opinion on the situation by telling Shaq that a hulking bum like him has no business giving orders to real athletes. Savage suggested to the assistant commissioner that if he didn't leave on his own, they would do the job for him. Shaq was unwavering, and was swiftly jumped by the three bitter combatants surrounding him. Fortunately, J-Pac came to the aid of the former Laker before any further damage could be done. Savage suggested that J-Pac would have learned to stay out of his affairs after their encounter in the Elimination Chamber, but promised him a fight if he wanted one from the three of them. O'Neal would eventually intervene, informing his three attackers that if they want a match with J-Pac at the twelfth Fest then they would have to face him as well. To even the odds, Shaq sought out the assistance of his former rival and current associate Charles Barkley. The commissioner wanted no part in this match, and suggested that his business partner find an alternative for the year's biggest event. It was at this point that Jericho claimed that he would be dedicating his performance at this year's Fest to the First Lady of SvR06, Barkley's recently-departed mother. The crossing of this line lit a fire under Sir Charles that propelled him to bury his pride and the hatchet with Shaq in order to fight the common enemy. At Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, we will witness one of the most star-studded match-ups in the history of the sport. Charles Barkley and Shaquille O'Neal will join forces alongside J-Pac to take on the antagonistic alliance of Chris Jericho, Count Out, and "Macho Man" Randy Savage. There isn't a marquee big enough to contain this star power!

One of the biggest stories coming out of January's Laugh Like Pee-wee was the surprise appearance made by Ken Shamrock in the 30-entrant over-the-top-rope match. A fan poll even named it the biggest jump-out-of-your-seat moment of the entire event. Although he didn't win, Shamrock's appearance left a lasting buzz for weeks and he was named guest assistant commissioner for a month by Charles Barkley. However, as he was attempting to conduct an interview with the competitors in the upcoming Elimination Chamber, Shamrock was ambushed by Brock Lesnar with two consecutive F5s. As if this wasn't enough, Lesnar continued the assault by overturning Shamrock's stretcher and pummeling him on the floor. Lesnar later explained that he was incensed that anyone would suggest that Ken Shamrock's inclusion in the Laugh Like Pee-wee match was anything compared to the destruction he put Kurt Angle through earlier that evening. In his own words, "Ken Shamrock ain't got shit on Brock Lesnar." The heinous attack was met with swift criticism by Shamrock's younger brother, Frank. Frank demanded that Lesnar apologize for his actions, and if he didn't, an apology would be forced out of him. Lesnar seemingly would admit his fault, offering his hand in courtesy. But no sooner than the two had shaken hands, Lesnar clinched Frank Shamrock in an unrelenting Kimura Lock and shattered his arm. This was the final straw for Commissioner Barkley, who announced that Brock Lesnar's contract as a professional wrestler would be suspended indefinitely. Upon hearing this announcement, Ken Shamrock resurfaced to demand that Barkley allow Lesnar to compete so that he could do to his ankle what he did to his brother's arm. Barkley was steadfast, refusing to let Brock do any further damage in the wrestling ring with the biggest event of the year on the horizon. Undaunted, Shamrock suggested that if the two of them couldn't enter the squared circle at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII that they would take things to his turf: inside the octagon. The lighting in Shamrock's eyes left Barkley with little choice and the match was made. Shamrock will be fighting out of his weight class, as well as giving up height and reach advantage. But if his rigorous training is any indication, it's going to be a hard night for one Brock Lesnar. It's The World's Most Dangerous Man versus The Beast Incarnate in an MMA Fight, only at Diaz's Fuck Fest.

The Kings of Crime have been running roughshod ever since they became the World Tag Team Champions. However, they hit a wall whenever they broke the oldest unwritten rule in SvR06. They pissed off The Undertaker. Early into January's Laugh Like Pee-wee match, Diaz and Fisk stuck their white-tipped noses where they didn't belong after previously offering The Deadman a large sum of money to eliminate DEFAULT Wiley. The interference led to Undertaker finding being propelled over the top rope and out of the match. Despite the fire in The Phenom's eyes, the champions were only mildly perturbed as the numbers remained in their advantage. But the fires would manifest in the form of a wayward soul by the name of Kane, who would align himself with The Undertaker to defeat The Kingpin while Ricardo Diaz fled. This wasn't enough for the infuriated Undertaker, however, as he noted that the Kings took something from him when they cost him a shot at the World Heavyweight Championship at Diaz's Fuck Fest. With that in mind, Taker claimed that Diaz's Fuck Fest XII would be the stage that he would come to collect their eye in retribution for his. The Undertaker and Kane would challenge Ricardo Diaz and The Kingpin for their World Tag Team Titles. And to ensure that Diaz could no longer run away, they would be locked inside the hellacious confines of a Steel Cage. The Kings of Crime have bested some of the most formidable opponents during their reign on the tag team throne. But they've never faced anything quite like Kane and The Undertaker.

At Dr. Meinheimer, Wing shocked the world when he returned to set his sights on the World Heavyweight Championship. However, only minutes prior, a disgruntled Nateflix would make a compelling argument as to why he should still be the reigning champion. In the months that followed, both would compete for the opportunity to enter the Diaz's Fuck Fest main event for the title but were ultimately unsuccessful. Despite this setback, the sights of The Watcher remained forward as he headed towards the biggest show of the year. To get there, he had to encounter a massive bump in the road by the name of The Shark. Wing appeared to have retribution well in hand for the man who broke his leg the summer prior. That was until the meddlesome Nateflix took this opportunity to reemerge and assist The Shark in victory. In the following weeks, Nateflix would continue to haunt and torment Wing. Most notably, the Master Manipulator placed a disembodied chicken head in the foot of Wing's bed. Nateflix would elaborate on his torturous behavior by pointing out how Wing is feared, yet respected. Nateflix added that he wants to strike the same fear that Wing evokes and command the same respect, and to do so, he has to defeat him on the biggest stage that there is. Wing agreed to face Nateflix, but clarified that respect isn't commanded but rather earned. At Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, Nateflix will have the opportunity to earn the fear and respect that he craves. But to do so, he will have to dethrone the omnipresent shadow that watches over all of SvR06. The man called Wing. Regardless of his methods, Reverend Drew has been one of the most resilient Intercontinental Champions in recent memory. Since moving forward without the fallback of his unholy church, the irreverent reverend has been more focused than ever. However, a chance run-in with Ben Unhinged may have shook that confidence when The Absolute Madman suggested that Drew would be exposed as the poor excuse of a champion he is. The words may have sunk in, as Reverend Drew became the first competitor in this year's Elimination Chamber to be eliminated. Feeling justified, Ben Unhinged announced that he wanted to give the prized Intercontinental Title a new home. As Reverend Drew was about to address this challenge, the two were interrupted by Carlito. The expert on all things cool admitted that he hasn't quite been the same since he lost in the main event of Diaz's Fuck Fest, but he wants to start his climb back to the top at this year's edition. As the reverend was about to answer both of these men, a familiar bell filled the arena as a smiling JBL confronted the three individuals. He assured everyone that the old JBL was back and followed up by accusing Reverend Drew of stripping him of his identity for too long. He continued by promising to strip Drew of the Intercontinental Title and that he would figuratively pummel him at Diaz's Fuck Fest like a young boy in a Japanese shower. While everyone considered how truly appalling this sounded out of context, a video interjected itself which proclaimed that "Chance was coming...for Intercontinental gold!" Reverend Drew had finally had enough and told all of them that he wasn't going to give any of them a shot at his title because they're all a bunch of jealous, poopy-pants babies who want the cool kid's toy but don't have parents that love them. At this point, guest assistant commissioner Shaquille O'Neal did his part as mediator on the situation. Shaq informed the reverend that whether or not he wants to give one of them a title shot, the championship has to be defended at the biggest show of the year. Considering all options, O'Neal decided that the title would be on the line in a six-man elimination style match-up including all challengers and the winner of a battle royal on the pre-show. Reverend Drew has spent the majority of his championship reign avoiding the competition. But at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, he doesn't have that option.

The Shark has spent nearly a year in SvR06, not working his way toward any sort of championship, but rather destroying anyone who happens to have the misfortune of standing in his path. Primarily, the biggest fish in the pond has spent the prior months feeding off of competitors half his size and stature. After such a destructive premier year, The Shark struggled to find a feast worth his while for the biggest event of the year. That was when Big Show came into the picture. The 7-foot gargantuan told The Shark that he may be the biggest fish in the pond, but he isn't anywhere near a giant. He would go on to say that until he beats him, he can't hold claim to being more than biggest runner up. With the challenge on the table, The Shark contemplated before declining the offer. The two colossal competitors didn't cross paths again until Andre the Giant made an appearance to declare Big Show as the most worthy successor to his legacy. This endorsement enraged the blood-thirsty behemoth, propelling The Shark to collapse the chest of the huge Hall of Famer. He would then inform Big Show that they could have their match, and he would prove why he's the true giant of SvR06. But a match this size could only be officiated by one man. Andre the Giant himself. When weighing in for this massive match, The Shark put the scales to the limit with his astounding 468 pounds of mass. Afterwards, Big Show tipped the scales by clocking in at an even more impressive 500 pounds. Guest referee Andre the Giant would then push the men aside and ascend the scales himself. The entire apparatus collapsed under Andre's weight. Clearly there is no man more deserving to officiate the Battle of the Behemoths, and it only happens at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII.

Sometimes it only takes a spark to start a wildfire. In this case, that spark came in the form of a fiery Colombian by the name of Ricardo Diaz. During a championship match with the Walter and Winslow Wiley, Diaz used the details of DEFAULT's conception as a means of distraction to win the match for the Kings of Crime. There has been much speculation since the event of whether or not the King of Coke was telling the truth by claiming that Walter was not really the father of DEFAULT. Diaz eventually elaborated on his claims by telling the world that he received this piece of information while having relations with DEFAULT's mother, Tits. Apparently, during her relationship with Walter, the couple attempted to conceive. Unfortunately, Walter had a problem with firing blanks and nothing ever came from it. That was when she turned to a donor. At this point, Winslow interrupted the discourteous Diaz and told him that if his family had to hear this story that it would be from him. As it would happen, the donor that Tits turned to was Walter's own flesh and blood. However, around the same time, Walter finally managed to achieve the deed after being inspired by a book called The Catcher and the Guy. Due to the circumstances, they allowed Walter to believe that DEFAULT was indisputably his son. The youngest Wiley was dismayed by this news, especially given that Winslow knew the entire time that he may be his father. Nevertheless, DEFAULT forgave him and only requested that Winslow participate in a paternity test with them. When the two turned to Walter, he stood and recounted the events that led their family to this point. After hesitation, Walter snapped at Winslow for allowing him to believe that a little freak like DEFAULT was indisputably his son. Walter refused to participate in any sort of paternity test, unless of course the blood extracted from DEFAULT is done by force in a match at Diaz's Fuck Fest. Winslow told Walter that he wouldn't lay a hand on DEFAULT, but took the stance that he continued not wanting to know whether he was the father or not. Winslow told Walter that if he was going to fight anyone, it would be him. At this point, DEFAULT stepped in and informed his father-uncles that he was tired of them fighting for him and against him. DEFAULT said that he wanted this family feud to end once and for all at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII with a Triple Threat match where the winner will receive the results of the Wiley family paternity test to do with what they wish. These three have been fought alongside and against one another since the inception of SvR06. At the twelfth Fest, the fighting will come to an end. On top of it all, the truth behind DEFAULT's own inception will hang in the balance.

Once again, the Money in the Bank Ladder match will provide one of the most astounding attractions at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII. Whether it be an up-and-coming star-to-be or a former champion looking to recapture their former glory, this match provides an opportunity for anyone looking to grasp the gold in the coming year. As we saw previously, Wrestler: Unstoppable became the first competitor to qualify for this bout when he defeated Chris Jericho in a massive upset. This will be his very first Fest match, but another red-headed hopeful looks to ascend the ranks once more as Sheamus seeks his second Money in the Bank briefcase. Always a highlight on the biggest show of the year is Rob Van Dam, whose exhilarating aerial offense never fails to impress. RVD knows a thing or two about getting that green so a Money in the Bank Ladder match is right up his alley. The fourth and final component has more than the briefcase in mind, as Mark Jindrak looks to use this annual extravaganza as a means of carving out his greatest Mark-Out Moment to date. By referring to his competition as a lowly bunch of has-beens and never-weres, Jindrak has already painted a massive target on his back. If he isn't careful, he may find that target being barraged by a throng of ladders. Four men will potentially put their lives on the line to climb the ladder of success at Diaz's Fuck Fest XII, but only one will descend with the Money in the Bank briefcase firmly in their grasp.

Results
Culmination. For many, one solitary event represents the conclusion of a year’s journey. This year, two men would battle for the greatest of prizes in a match that would bring about the end of a war of numerous casualties. All of their efforts, both dastardly and honorable, have been for this moment. This culmination point. But before that, men would fight for the honor of their fallen while others would fight for pride. It’s Diaz’s Fuck Fest XII, the climactic spectacle of the titans!

Before the event kicked off, Rey Mysterio headed to the ring to defend his Cruiserweight Championship in yet another open challenge. This time, he was answered by the return of the Japanese Buzzsaw known as Tajiri. With a furious flurry of kicks, Tajiri almost provided a major upset on the biggest stage for the champion. However, the turning point in the match would unexpectedly occur whenever Mysterio was blinded by Tajiri’s green mist. Visionless, Rey would proceed to attack the referee while under the impression that it was Tajiri and was ultimately disqualified. A disqualification loss may not be the most desirable result at the biggest event of the year, but if Mysterio’s recent attitude is any indication, retaining the title is a far greater priority.

The second match of this year’s extended pre-show was an over-the-top-rope battle royal featuring a handful of Intercontinental Championship hopefuls looking to land a spot in the Sinister Six-way match for the title later on. Much to Ric Flair’s displeasure, his pet project “Just” Christian was immediately eliminated from the contest. Following him was Shithouse representative Josh the Cat, as well as one half of the Dust Busters in Goldust. Putting his strength on display, Scott Steiner powered Diamondust out of the ring. Unfortunately, a miscalculation would lead to Chewbacca capitalizing and eliminating Big Poppa Pump to punch his ticket for the main portion of the event.

With introductions out of the way, the Money in the Bank briefcase was hung high above the ring as some of the SvR06 elite came to the ring to battle for it. Those competitors were initial qualifier Wrestler: Unstoppable, high-flying extraordinaire Rob Van Dam, moment-making Mark Jindrak, and a Mad Max-inspired Sheamus. Each combatant put their desire for success on display, from Sheamus Brogue Kicking ladders over to RVD landing Five-Star Frog Splashes from the top of them. Wrestler: Unstoppable could have easily been named the winner had the match been decided by who planted on top of a ladder for the longest amount of time. But despite all their best efforts, it was Mark Jindrak making good on his promise to deliver a Mark-Out Moment worthy of the Fest by ascending a ladder and retrieving the coveted case. He will now have the opportunity to challenge the champion at any point in time.

Following this exhilarating inaugural match, crew made their way to ringside to reinforce the ring for the next contest. With Andre the Giant officiating, it was time for the Battle of the Behemoths between Big Show and The Shark. After the unanticipated fast-paced opening sequences, the clash would eventually devolve into a power struggle of overhand slaps and cornering the competitor on the opposite side of the ring. The crowd were brought to their feet when Big Show used all the strength he had to lift The Shark into the air for a chokeslam through the announce desk. With his power expended, The Shark would go in for the kill on Big Show by crushing his sternum as he has so many before him. If this match was indication, this behemoth is far from relinquishing his spot at the top of the food chain.

After the conclusion of the pre-show battle royal, the stage was officially set for the Sinister Six-way match for the Intercontinental Championship. The defending champion, Reverend Drew, made his way to the ring while evoking the spirit of a Western priest. He was joined by an eclectic group of challengers including Ben Unhinged, Carlito, JBL, Chewbacca, and the launch party for the new-and-improved Chance. Despite his layers of fur garments, Chance was no match for one of Ben’s erratic series of punches. However, it was Chewie who would score the pin to eliminate the man touted as “The Chance you can’t afford to take.” Likewise, Carlito was eliminated from the match in similar fashion and was followed by Ben Unhinged. Finally picking up on his hijinks, Reverend Drew and JBL turned their attention to the figurehead of the Shithouse Society and eradicated him from the bout. With that, it was down to two former allies. One irreverent reverend and a man who claimed he had his identity taken by the individual standing across from him. Reverend Drew had JBL right where he wanted him until Chance returned to ringside and indirectly repaid everything that JBL ever did for him by preventing the referee from making the count. The Wolf of Wall Street would capitalize on the distraction to capture his first Intercontinental Title.

The following match-up focused on fear. Since he began emulating cinematic menaces, Nateflix has been obsessed with becoming the most feared individual in the locker room. To do so, he chose Wing as his target. The Watcher’s portentous presence would be put on exhibition as he made a walk to the ring that would make Brandon Lee gulp. Nateflix came with this guard up, nonetheless, dawning a weathered mask that sent the message that Wing was merely for the birds. Despite the mind games played, Nateflix could not deny that Wing was a formidable opponent. This overlooked factor may have ultimately lead to his downfall, as Wing decisively made Nateflix eat crow and proved why he is one of the most feared yet respected competitors in the ring.

After 2 Unlimited rocked the house with their hit song “No Limit,” all eyes descended upon the ominous octagon that would soon contain two hungry lions by the name of Brock Lesnar and Ken Shamrock. Considering the personal nature of this heated rivalry, the audience was on the edge of their seat to see these two MMA specialists come to blows. Shamrock initially demonstrated why he is known as The World’s Most Dangerous Man, restraining Lesnar while wearing the beast down with a rapid series of knees to the skull. Despite being grounded, Brock would quickly recover and retaliate with a blow that rocked Shamrock and brought the match to an abrupt conclusion via first round knockout. After a year of proclaiming himself the greatest amateur athlete to ever set foot in the wrestling ring, Lesnar may have officially solidified that claim on the biggest night of the year.

The next match saw the boiling point of SvR06’s most dysfunctional family. A Triple Threat match between all three members of the Wiley family unit where the winner would receive the results of DEFAULT’s paternity test. Being the good uncle-dad that he is, Winslow did his best to protect DEFAULT from Walter throughout the hellacious three-way but the two would eventually go fist-to-claw as well. When it appeared DEFAULT had the identity of his father firmly in his grasp, Walter ambushed his son-nephew from behind with a steel chair and stole the victory as he had so many before. With the results in his hand, Walter ripped the document to shreds in the middle of the ring. We may now never know who DEFAULT’s real father is, but at the end of the day, the youngest Wiley seemed to be content knowing what he was and he was proud of it.

After fleeing The Undertaker and Kane last time they met, Ricardo Diaz would be locked inside a Steel Cage with the demonic tandem along with The Kingpin as the World Tag Team Titles were defended. In true Phenom fashion, Undertaker built up his energy all year long to make a brisk exit from the ring and once again didn’t disappoint when he scaled the cage to escape first. The Kings of Crime took full advantage of the two-on-one advantage by teaming up on Kane, which gave Diaz the opportunity to climb out of the structure as well. In a horrifying sight, Kingpin ascended to the top of the cage yet hesitated when he caught a glimpse of the bright lights and the packed arena. It was clear by the look on his face that he’d found the opportunity to attempt the biggest Six-Star King Splash yet. With bated breath, the capacity crowd watched as Wilson “The Kingpin” Fisk soared from multiple feet in the air…and missed. After recovering, Kingpin was met by the gloved hand of Kane goozling his giggling jowls and planted him in the mat with a conclusive chokeslam before climbing out of the steel structure to win the World Tag Team Titles for he and The Undertaker.

Two of the most powerful forces in the world would collide as United States Champion Batista stepped between the ropes with the returning Ultimate Warrior. Batista has been dominant since his arrival, but the opening moments of the match proved that he had never encountered anything that could compare to the strength of the Ultimate One. The returning Warrior wouldn’t disappoint his following, steamrolling Batista on numerous occasions. However, his strength got the best of him when the referee found himself caught in the crossfire. This allowed Batista to resort to underhanded tactics and eventually the pinfall. Batista may have walked out the victor on this night, but the circumstances left many questioning whether he was truly the more powerful of the two.

After reminding everyone that he was dedicating the following match to Mama Barkley, Chris Jericho led the team of Count Out and “Macho Man” Randy Savage into battle. Following their entrances, the voice over the loudspeaker inquired if y’all were ready for this as a basketball shorts-clad J-Pac emerged from the clouded tunnel, followed by commissioner Charles Barkley and finally guest assistant commissioner Shaquille O’Neal. Due to Shaq’s unfamiliarity with the rules of wrestling, Y2J’s crew cut the ring in half with their Hack-a-Shaq offense. The tactics worked, until Count Out tagged himself in as his idol Jericho would have done. In no time, the tables were turned with Barkley getting his hands on the belligerent Jericho while Shaq handled Macho Man. J-Pac made quick work of Count Out to bring an end to this intense game of three-on-three.

With that, it was time for event to reach its culmination point. Two men’s journeys, intertwined with one another, would come to an end. Triple H and Dynamite Derek. But only one would achieve their goal. The Dark Luminary was unyielding as always, but it was evident that it was becoming progressively harder to mount any level of comeback against The Game’s onslaught. Triple H entered this match with the mentality that he had nothing to prove, viewing Dynamite Derek merely as a barrier between him and the world’s greatest prize. As the match progressed, this mindset became more and more apparent. Yet through it all, Dynamite continued to withstand it all as he knew he could never allow Helmsley to become champion. Fed up, Triple H finally made a move for the equalizer. The vile sledgehammer. But when he looked, his weapon of choice was nowhere to be found. On the opposite side of the ring, Dynamite Derek appeared from underneath the ring with the sledgehammer firmly in hand. Triple H pleaded for mercy, but the sincerity of his words was exposed when he made a grab for the weapon. Dynamite Derek countered, delivering an initial blow for the Justice Bros that Triple H was responsible for destroying. A second hit for Commissioner Barkley, who Triple H tormented and left in a hospital bed a year prior. A third strike for his friends like J-Pac and Ben Unhinged that Triple H did everything he could to hold back. And lastly, Dynamite Derek split the sledgehammer over Triple H for himself. The masked defender of SvR06 would then cover Triple H to become the undisputed World Heavyweight Champion. The gold gleamed as the bright lights radiantly shined upon it, a glaring beacon for all to gaze upon as Dynamite Derek proudly hoisted it into the air for all to find a haven beneath.